Sunday, January 19, 2014

Sexual Inadequacy: Out of shape and overweight...

I’m feeling totally inadequate right this morning…  Last night, around 1am, we got woken up by a woman in a nearby apartment screaming in total ecstasy for about forty-five minutes…  It was almost constant “Oh yes!  Fuck Yes!  Oh Fuck, Oh Fuck, Yes, Yes!  Fuck Me Hard, Hard, Fuck Me! Fuck Me!” with a minute or two of wordless moaning here and there before building up into pleasurable screams again. There was the occasional grunting of a guy’s voice, a bit more towards the end as he was probably climaxing, then the two of them mumbling together for a bit…

Leena hates hearing it, saying that women having sex is a turn-off for her.  I’m sort of the opposite, I like it, like hearing a “live performance” and get totally turned on by it.  Granted, this woman isn’t as good as a former neighbor who lived across the hall, who didn’t last as long, but just sounded a bit “sweeter” and sexier...

Leena was nearly asleep a while after that, but I was totally awake, thinking solely about sex, of course.  I’d wanted us to make out earlier in the morning, but she wasn’t feeling too well, bad acid reflux, so we didn’t go beyond cuddling till she wanted to get up (despite her clear invitation for morning action the night before, before she could’ve anticipated that she’d not be feeling well in the morning…).

Not able to sleep, I joined her in her part of the bed and things went okay while I went down on her.  But then when it was time for the condom, I lost it…  Then after that, once my own member was lubricated from unrolling the condom on it as I was losing it, her messaging me made me lose control and come before I could get another rubber out…  A disappointing, though not unpleasurable end, but nowhere near as good as it could’ve been.

This sort of thing happens regularly and Leena is usually comforting and reassuring that I’m ok, but after hearing quite a performance from nearby, it just left me feeling pretty bad in the sexual department (especially after managing a condom twice last weekend and hoping for a repeat…).

Now it’s later in the morning and that neighbor has had two more sessions of the same thing, although each seems to be about ten minutes shorter than the last.  But still, I’m just thinking about how great in bed her guy must be.  And at this point in life, it’s unlikely I’ll ever be such a stud…

Rarely have I felt more like what I am turning into, an overweight, out-of-shape, middle-aged guy with erectile trouble.